TRUST ISSUES & SIGNING "PRE-NUPTIAL" AGREEMENTS | DOES LOVE EXIST OR ARE ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS A TRANSACTIONAL EXCHANGE OF CONVENIENCE?
Welcome back Ladies & Gentlemen,
Brand new week & another addition to the #talkyourmoneyseries! This time we will be exploring the topic of trust issues and prenuptial agreements on the increase among our generation. I've been asked many times whether I would personally get a pre-nuptial agreement myself and truthfully... the answer is yes. I am not adamant on that answer however, I would not see the issue in signing one if myself and my future partner agreed it was the best step. I know the next question you will ask : Aren't you religious? Doesn't it defeat the purpose of making vows before Christ and 'set the marriage up for failure?'
The answer to that is ... I am religious. More so, yes I will make those vows before Christ too. I am sure God doesn't want people to be victim to house fires but you still take out house insurance in advance right? Based on the increasing divorce figures shown below ( Figure 1), not all marriages prosper and I am pretty certain that when most couples get married they do not anticipate divorce, but it happens. So protect yourselves.I believe in this generation, most relationships are a 'transactional convenience', with most people determining compatibility on the basis of income, social class and aesthetics in an era where social mobility is becoming increasingly difficult.
There are four main reasons I believe are the cause of relationship instability and trust issues are:
1)Social media - acting as means for comparison to other 'relationship goals'
2) Social media- often insinuating that love is showcased via material possession
3)Social media - an amplifier for the negative romantic experiences others have experienced, which gradually inflicts paranoia in the way we deal with our own experiences.
4)Social media- a platform for societal judgement & a trigger of trust issues which can have on effect on the self
The way in which social media has amplified a sense of competition in wealth and appearance, has triggered the desire for most young people to sign a "pre-nup" because, we have affiliated love with material to the extent it is hard to tell the genuine from the fakes. People have are becoming so caught up in this idea that their material possessions define them to the point where there is an increasing desire to protect their possessions in every way possible.
The final point I will conclude this discussion on, is that this generation has been affected by a "trauma of lust" and it shows. Most people who often say their 'heartbreak' has had a significant negative effect on their perception on love, have been undiagnosed survivors of 'lustationships.' Linking this back to social media, a lot of people are striving for something picture perfect and go for what looks nice rather than what is nice, even with several red flags waving. Leading me to the conclusion that most of the time relationships are a 'transactional convenience' but never lose hope of finding true love!
Let me know your views on this topic, I would love to hear them!
Until next time,